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Those aren't my earrings.

Before I met my husband, I dated a guy who cheated on me.

The day I discovered what happened I decided to stop by and see him ...unannounced. He always left his door unlocked. (He probably doesn't anymore though.) Regardless, when I entered his house I went right to the bathroom since I'd been driving for some time. I was about to call him and ask when he'd be home, when I discovered a pair of hoop earrings on the bathroom shelf. Those aren't my earrings, I thought. But whose are they? I walked into his bedroom. There was a photo of some random naked woman cuddling his dog.

Don't ask.

I called him. He was pretty nervous.

Just then, the door opened and the same woman from the photo enters, fully clothed, with his dog. Apparently she had the task of walking the dog and was ready to give me an earful. Needless to say, it was quite a messy confrontation. My relationship subsequently ended, and I was grateful.

I wasn't in love with this guy so besides a bruised ego, it was easy to let him go. But what happens when you are in love? What if the individual who cheated on you is your spouse? How do you manage that moment? Your emotions?

People cheat for many reasons. Some of the most common motivations are when the person no longer feels emotionally connected to the partner, they have low self esteem, they're sexually unhappy with their mate, or they have a sexual addiction. Whatever the cause, when there is infidelity you still have to deal with the fallout.

That incident happened almost two decades ago. I'll never stop by someone's home unannounced again. But I'm glad that I did that day.

*Subscribe to MyOshun ⬆️ for 6 tips on how to get through infidelity.

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Everywhere darkness. Thank goodness I have a plethora of candles! Power outages immediately remind me to be keenly aware of my surroundings. Slow down. Can you feel where you're going? Finally… a candle. It’s funny how light easily permeates the darkness.

Darkness isn't exactly fun but it’s a wonderful reminder of how we take the necessity of light for granted both literally and figuratively.

The absence of light is darkness. It has no power. It is the light that has power over darkness. But why do we have such a problem accessing this light in the face of dark, heavy, troubling experiences?

We know that we cannot alter certain challenges that are naturally a part of life. A family member will die, someone we know will become ill, and so on. But we’re not here to pretend that darkness does not exist. However, we can bring our kindness, love and care to our relationships and every situation that needs it. That is light. It is the best of us. That part of you that creates a dinner for a grieving family, visits a friend or relative in need, or simply, tells your spouse that you appreciate his/her contribution to the family. When we show up with presence, grace and love, we bring the light.

*Subscribe to MyOshun ⬆️ for tips on how you can overcome the darkness by bringing more light to your life and your relationships.

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Happy Holidays! Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and other December holidays celebrate important principles, life and love in the form of light. Since winter is the darkest season, we value this reminder of light illumined in all of its forms. These celebrations warm our hearts and kindle our relationships. I must admit, I do enjoy all of the gatherings, dinners and shopping connected with the holidays. It's a joyous time of giving and indulging which can be wonderful! However, it's a great deal of energy radiating outwards while we're having all of this fun. This is why we can feel a little depleted during the holidays as well. Most of us consider this "normal" during this time of year and there's nothing really that can be done about it. But there is. Take small moments to reawaken your energy or inner light, if you will. You can step away from the hubbub of the fa-la-la-la-la and take care of yourself. You'll be better equipped to handle all the energy of the season. Do it. You're worth it.

Have a beautiful holiday season! Daydree

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