April 2006. Just another ordinary month in an ordinary year… or so I thought.
But, let’s back up a bit.
I met him at our university in 1991 at a Halloween party. He was wearing lipstick, had long brown hair, and charming as all get out. His costume, a woman. Mine, a hippie. We talked and laughed all night. I gave him my number and our relationship was on.
Everything about Theo seemed to be a perfect match for me, right down to our birth. We were born on the same day of the same year. Just 3 1/2 hours apart. My youth told me: This was a sign that we were meant to be.
Also, he was an artist and made pencil sketches of me. He said that he got lost in my eyes and would draw pictures of them over and over again. We spent tons of time together on dates, hung out in his dorm room, and took the occasional road trip on the weekends. Theo was the guy with an entourage, he had lots of friends. And was clearly the leader of the pack. I suddenly had a whole new set of buddies. As an only child, this was another sign that we were meant to be, right? Theo was my first love.
However, after just one semester of first love bliss, he transferred to a school with warmer weather because his sports scholarship no longer applied based on an injury. So he left. But, our relationship continued long distance.
It evolved into a strange and uncomfortable experience for me as the years wore on.
After graduation, I moved to California, expecting that our relationship would easily return to normalcy since he was in California, too. It did not. I’d call Theo to hang out. Occasionally, he’d answered the phone, but most times, he wouldn’t. But when he’d call me, I was right there to respond. We were clearly drifting and the relationship was clearly on his terms. I started dating other people and knew he was doing the same. But, I just wanted to be with him. We became the couple that was mostly off, and occasionally - on.
Then, in early 2006, we decided it was time to be in a committed relationship once again. He promised that he wanted to be monogamous too. I was more than ready to be his # 1.
In April 2006, Theo had a business trip where he’d be gone for just 5 days and when he returned, our monogamous relationship would be resuscitated. I was thrilled. But when he returned from that business trip he informed me that he met someone new and would need to see both of us at the same time. I was done. It landed on my soul what was happening. Theo had no intention of really being monogamous… ever. His father wasn’t monogamous. And his father’s baby mamas were cool with it, so Theo thought I would be too. Because after all, that was his modeling.
After 15 years, he should have known me. That said, after 15 years I should have known him! So when he asked me to be his other # 1, I said: No. I am the only one. And with that, I left him. As the universe would have it, 4 months later I met my fabulous husband who is indeed the love of my life.
When the heart is well and clear, your beloved will arrive.
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